Category Archives: Uncategorized

Day 3: Down this road once again

It’s Day 3 once more without Alcohol. I’ve been down this road so many times. This time I hope is my last day 3. I do not have too many chances left. My health is failing. I am having bad muscle cramps. I researched on the internet and found out that muscle cramps are caused by a deficiency of Vitamin B1, B6, B12 and Calcium. I’ve been have vitamin and calcium suplements. It’s helping. The muscle cramps are getting better.

I am feeling irritated, anxious and restless. I keep thinking of booze and drinking. The holiday season doesn’t make it easier. It’s hard to resist the temptations around me. I am trying to avoid social situations where there will be drinking.

My high school’s 25th reunion is coming up in the next couple of weeks. I do not want to attend the party because I know there’s going to be serious drinking involved. I know I wont be able to resist. What do I do? I am confused. Not going to the reunion will raise so many questions. But do I really care? I am not really close to anyone of my old schoolmates. So what does it matter?

I don’t want to go to AA. Too much religion for me. I’ve been an atheist for a long time now. I just can’t make myself believe in a higher power. My life has been all about logic and facts. It’s difficult to blindly believe and have faith in a “higher power”.

In India, there aren’t many places where an alcoholic can go to seek help. Alcoholism is frowned upon but no one offers any support. There’s a few AA groups, but that isn’t for me. The rehabs are more like prisons, very primitive, where alcoholics are treated like criminals. So I have to do this myself. I have no other choice.

I am lucky I have a home and a family to support me. I guess I am better off than a lot of people out there.

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ADDICTION EXPLAINED


Addiction Is So Wasteful

I loved this video. It is so simple and yet it says so much.


Alcohol

image

Found this on 9gag. It’s so true.


5 Common Questions of the Newly Sober

I found this post and it helped me. I’m rebloging it here so that someday it can help someone else. If you like it, please visit the blog and read the other posts by this amazing blogger.

UnPickled Blog

Almost everyone I’ve spoken to in recovery started out by asking themselves these five questions:

  1. Am I Really an Alcoholic?

We have this idea that there are two kinds of drinkers: the good people who can handle it and the bad people who lose control and become alcoholics. No one wants to cross the line and join the losing team. No one is excited about a new identity that carries enormous social stigma and shame. The notion alone kept me drinking long after I knew something was wrong. I didn’t want to wear that label, and anyway how could I be the “A” word? I was successful and happy, not miserable and screwed up. I just needed to get my nightly wine habit under control (whatever that meant).

To quit drinking simply makes us “non-drinkers”, not necessarily “alcoholics”. Forget labels, diagnosis, teams, categories, or stereotypes.

The underlying question is really…

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8pm and delaying a drink

It’s 8pm here and I am dying for a drink. All i can think of is a drink. But I am delaying. It’s the 3rd day again. It’s becoming a habit, coming here and writing a blog post every other third day. Is this recovery? Who am I fooling?

Anyway. Can’t think too much now. Just need to delay.


Survived the 3rd evening with the help of weed

I did it. I survived the 3rd day without drinking. Or rather the evening. It’s usually the evenings which are worse. The craving for alcohol is very strong in the evenings.
I have been smoking weed for the past few days. In fact weed helps to take the edge off. Got to control my consumption or I’ll end up being addicted to weed too.
Some people will tell you that weed isn’t addictive, but don’t believe them. It is. In fact it is my substance of choice. Alcohol is just a poor substitute.
What am I getting myself into. Off alcohol and into weed? Or both after a while. That’s how it usually goes.