Day 4 of sobriety – getting easier


Today is day 4 of staying sober and it’s getting easier. The cravings are not so severe. This is the longest I have stayed sober for a long time. In the past I haven’t been sober for longer than 3 days. This time I have not been smoking weed either. I haven’t smoked weed for a few weeks now and I won’t smoke it ever again.

I read on the internet that the metabolites of alcohol stay in the body for 4 days to 1 week. Maybe my body is getting rid of the junk.

The tingling sensation in the back of my head is still there and my hands are still shaking. I keep thinking of booze, but it’s getting easier to resist the temptation.

My mind keeps making excuses, that I am not really an alcoholic, that I can control myself, that it’s okay to have a drink. I know that this is denial. I know I am an alcoholic and if I go out and get a drink, I won’t be able to control myself. I’ll just spiral back into the same old routine.

I’ve locked myself at home and haven’t gone out for the past four days. I don’t know whether I will be able to control myself if I see a wine shop. Avoiding is easier and safer. But I will have to go out eventually. I don’t know how I’ll deal with that but for now I’m taking things one day at a time. I’ll worry about it when I come to it.

The anxiety and irritability is still there. So are the mood swings. I keep telling myself these are not my true feelings. That they are a result of my craving for alcohol. I have to keep reminding myself but it seems to be working.

The muscle cramps are gone too. I read that alcohol affects calcium absorption and this causes cramps. I’ve been having over the counter calcium tablets as well as tablets that my doctor prescribed for blood pressure. Apart for these and cigarettes I am totally clean.

I’ve been keeping myself busy watching movies online. These past few days, I’ve watched several movies. It’s a distraction and helps keep me occupied. I know it’s a waste of time. I should be out looking for a job or freelance projects. But somewhere inside me I know that it is too early. I need to give it a few more days. It’s not safe right now.

I’ve given myself 1 week. After that I will go out and try to pick up the pieces of my life.

Advertisements

9 responses to “Day 4 of sobriety – getting easier

  • losingandhealing

    Yes, go you!!! Congrats on day four! I also gave myself a week of JUST being sober before trying to add any new stresses to my life.
    Good work and keep at it!!

    Liked by 1 person

  • Surly Girl

    So proud of you! There are reminders everywhere. Give yourself time and when you get back out there reach out for support. Its nearly impossible to do this on your own. Happy for you!!

    Like

  • winterroad

    Well done fella. I never thought I could do one day nevermind four, yet here I am in my fourth week of no drinking. I know how hard this is so you should be proud. There will be tests ahead but remember how you feel today.

    Like

    • Riju

      Thank you for the encouragement Winterroad and for understanding. It is so difficult to find people who understand without being judgemental or condescending. It means a lot to me.

      Liked by 1 person

  • PABookie

    I would suggest that one week of reduced stress may not be enough. I think 3 weeks would be better. Addiction is very hard to overcome and stress is a major cause of setbacks. Not having a job is stressful of course and only you can decide which is worse: no job, or looking for a job. Always remember, that addiction is as serious as the most serious condition you can think of and has to be dealt with very carefully.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: